How to increase self esteem



Learning how to increase self esteem is completely achievable if you know and understand where to start the process off, and once you gain in self esteem, then your confidence grows too.

Much is written about self esteem, all very similar in context and words, and you may find you relate to many of the symptoms of low self esteem. In this day and age it is extremely easy to put a label on someone and say “they have low self esteem, just look at them”. Often this arises from body language, which we’ll talk about later.

Countless questions are also always asked about how to improve self esteem, which is why it’s important that you understand whether you do have low self esteem signs. Once you’ve worked this out (and take some time to do this), then you can begin the process of building confidence and overcome low self esteem.


No 1# rule for how to increase low self esteem

It would be wise to first of all work out whether you actually understand the meaning of self esteem.

Self esteem is a massive topic and comes under the umbrella of self improvement, or self development, and learning more about the topic will really help on your road to becoming a better person within. Learning how you view yourself, what you say to yourself and how you feel about what you say to yourself is the first step in improving your self. Understand that with a low self esteem comes negativity, poor confidence and more than likely, unhappiness.

If you skip the stage of how you view yourself, you won’t understand where your problem lies which is the very essence of how to increase self esteem. It’s very important to find your bottom line. This links to Melanie Farrell’s book on How To Overcome Low Self Esteem, and I would highly recommend this book to you. It’s full of brilliant ideas and worksheets that you can use and work your way through finding your “bottom line”, and also has countless examples of people with low self esteem that you may be able to relate to. It’s also an easy book to read as it flows well.


No 2# rule for how to increase low self esteem

Now you know how you view yourself, take some time to look at these low self esteem signs, and see if you think you have any of these. Sometimes people just don’t recognise the signs as, overtime, they have just become habits, but habits that are so set in stone that they become “normal” to you.

As I mentioned above, one of the low self esteem signs is negative body language Negative body language is a tell tale sign for low self esteem, but is easy to correct when you are aware that you have this issue.

Take some time again to have a look at the low self esteem signs and work out where you fit in on a scale of 1-10 on the low self esteem scale – 1 being very low and 10 being a high self esteem.


No 3# rule for how to increase low self esteem

By now you should have established whether you have a low or high self esteem and also what self esteem actually means. Time now to do some more work on attitude.

Much of improving self esteem and establishing exactly how to increase self esteem comes down to your attitude. Positive attitude. Negative thinking is high on the list of people who have low self esteem, and learning how to have a positive attitude is vital if you want to improve confidence and build your self esteem.

It isn’t going to happen over night. Your low self esteem has taken years to become a habit, it’s now going to take some time to turn that around, but it can be done if you are serious about it.

Building self esteem is where you will find more in depth detail on how you more than likely predict situations and occasions, (what is going to happen at these events) and therefore, without realising it, you take precautions for these predictions not to happen (in other words you may decide not to accept an invitation on the basis that you've predicted what may happen, but in hindsight, probably won't happen).

If that doesn’t make sense, I recommend you follow the link above! Causes of stress and anxiety come from these types of predictions. This needn’t be the case if you are serious about changing your self esteem. Learning to overcome stress and anxiety in little steps is a great booster for improving your self esteem.


No 4# rule of how to increase self esteem

Sometimes you just need to get out of your comfort zone in order to improve your whole being. For many this is an extremely difficult task, but one which pays dividends. Do it once and then it gets easier and easier.

Learning how to increase self esteem may mean little tasks such as smiling first before someone else does, or shaking someones hand before the other person (again this may be going out of your comfort zone, but worth trying as it makes all the difference). Be brave. Check out these great self esteem boosters for improving your confidence – they work wonders!


All these tips and techniques for how to increase self esteem will help. They are also easily do-able, things you can do every day, whatever your lifestyle. Start these simple techniques now and watch your self esteem increase.

Don’t however suffer in silence. It may be that you actually need to see a therapist, (and if you do feel this, I would strongly recommend you consult your doctor), but for others, these simple techniques of how to increase self esteem can be worked at, and they can and do help to build your self esteem.

You have to always remember though, that you are YOU, and you do not need to pretend to be someone else, or to live up to others expectations. Feeling this way puts huge pressure on you and in turn will lower your self esteem.

Be yourself, but grow in confidence by learning how to increase self esteem.


Return to Home page

Return to What is Self Esteem





My recommendation for an excellent Self Esteem book.  Easy to read and full of  information you can use straight away.